extinct (melissakate) wrote in socialpretender,
extinct
melissakate
socialpretender

Analyzing my Poser-ish ways.

Before school started this year I made a friend with this goth guy who I learned way too much about too soon. In fact...so much that I didn't want to hang out with anymore. I learned he had some very strong emotional/mental problems and being around him just kind of made me sad like I had to fix all of his problems. I don't really know why I feel like that but I do. It's something I inherit from my mom. But anyway this morning in the commons (where everyone basically hangs out before school) I waved to him...and he came over and we talked a little. But he still seemed like he is his usual depressed self. But I felt good that I had put the differences aside and been a friend and said hi.

The reason I am talking about this here is because I am wondering how he even became a "goth" as we call them. Did he just one day wake up and start wearing all black and chain necklaces and black nail polish? I mean is it something that you integrate into your life? I almost thought myself better than him because I was "normal" as they say. I shouldn't pretend to be better than anyoene else. Like I have something more than you because I am not on medication to make me feel better. That is the biggest way I am a "social pretender" is that, I frequently separate myself from people if we don't have a hell of a lot in common or if we don't "click" right away or if we're not "the same" somehow.
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